before school starts, we went on a....
08.28.05 (5:35 pm) [edit]road trip! lol. basically across my entire state, lengthwise. about a 1.5 hour drive. we went up there to check out one of the most haunted places in my state, dudleyville... or dudleytown. whichever it is. we spent like and hour finding the place, just driving around all the streets where we had the idea where it was. after we finally found it, we didnt really know where to park the car, seeing as how it was filled with NO TRESPASSING signs everywhere. we basically sat there while it rained for another half hour, and decided to just ask the peoepl that owned it if we could enter for a 'school project' we were doing. which really isnt a lie, we might do it on that. but no one answered, so we just decided to go in.
about half way up, i got the feelin something was behind us. but i didnt wanna say anything, cuz then itd seem like i was scared. i just constantly glanced back. then, i noticed my friend kept doing it too. hes like, 'i keep thinking someones behind us. its freaky as shit.' me too! but yea. then, ::rustle rustle:: "what the hell!??!" 2 deer fawn come out of the bush and look at us, then run away. that was really cool, but surprised us. then some dog started barkin, probably alerting the owners that we trespassing. so we left, when KABOOM! tree falls down. that was uncool, yet completly aweosme. so we left.
and then we drove around for a while, and we went to some state park, where we climbed up some sort of 3 story watch tower! and i fell down the stairs. and at the park we fought off bees! lol
more driving, all and all it was fun. we fooled around alot, saw some cool things, did some cool stuff. my fave view of all the place was when we were driving on the mountains, and u could see the clouds. not see as in a cloudscape, but can see them in 3D version. it was amazing. a view to die for lol
a great way to end a summer...
some
08.24.05 (6:02 am) [edit]ok, ok, ok. the army called me. they want me to join, duh. but they said i can have ANY army occupation id want basically. cuz we took the ASVAB test, armed services vocational aptitude battery. its for what ud work with in the army. i got like a 93, which i guess was like the highest in my school or somthing. or one of the. so im like.... secret operative? assassin? military leader of my own country?
::scattered whispers:: ummmm we are not at liberty to say...
lol so thats cool.
my boss owns like 3 subway stores, i work at one. now, he wants me to work at another one too, and get a raise cuz thats how good i am lol.
i went to the movies, saw 40 yr old Virgin, and Red Eye. red eye was not so good, but virgin was an excellent movie and really funny. i suggest seeing that.
andddd thats about it. sortin thru some of my friends problems again... best wishes to them! lol. woot.
alone
08.19.05 (6:02 pm) [edit]i have a phobia. well, its more a fear than a phobia, but arent they the same? anyways
i fear being alone. most of us do, but i have an extreme fear of it. i cant take it. if i dont see anyone i know (family doesnt count) for like 6 hours, i start to become scared. not scared for them. just scared il be alone. then it turns to worry, fear, and then depression. after about half a week id become suicidal. and suicide is something i absolutly DETEST and would never do under any circumstances. but its better than being alone...
and like all my rantings, it involves music. music can prolong my feelings of alone for about another half a week. making my whole stay- one week before i get messed up psychologically.
i hate being alone
too much music
08.16.05 (4:41 am) [edit]ha? could there be such a thing as too much?
well, as ive said b4 ive taken a liking to this punk/emo type music. and its not like im BECOMING this, no. i just broadened my musical horizons with a new genre of music. but anyways
so yea. all ive been doing is finding a band, downloading like 10 or 12 of their songs. and then we found a magazine with 1000 songs to download now! so we did. lol. listening to the good ones is fun, but not the bad ones.
and school is almost here again. sigh. im not really looking forward to it, but i kinda am. its the time to see everyone and how they changed, what they been up to. catch up with friends and non friends, new friends. yesterday a couple of my friends came down from where they live (which is another town) and we all went to the mall and i got my hawthorne heights cd finally. and we just hung out and had fun. grrrr food court was closed!!! but i had some japanese food, cuz that was still open. yumm lol.
not looking forward to school becuz its gonna be my final year. no more school, friends, or anything easy like that. im gonna have to get out, find a real job and work on starting my life. i dont wanna!!!!
thunderstormsssss
08.12.05 (4:52 pm) [edit]finally. ive been waiting all summer and winter for it. a massive thunderstorm! yes! ones with flashes so bright ud think it was daylight without a sky. where u can [i]see[/i] the bolt coming down, and feel the thunder. it was amazing.
whats not so amazing, is having 3 hours of sleep in 2 days, walking home in a massively severe thunderstorm (very scary), getting wet and cold from rain, all while having a headache and not feeling quite well. not so fun.
magical sphere of billiards.
08.09.05 (5:30 pm) [edit]the magic 8ball.
for millenia, it has puzzled curious mankind with its astounding ability to acurately answer yes or no questions. some would think, its a 50-50 chance right? wrong. magic 8balls know all, and tells all.... in the form of a simple yes, no, maybe, or ask again later.
today, we have found a magic 8ball in my friends house. as a fun time, i asked it a question. it was right. then right again. and again. and again. i decided to ask it some will i? questions. the answers came out in my favor, or what was most plausible.
my question is, how? how does a simple device with a tiny shape floating in water know so many things?? is it truly a device of the gods, sent down to tell us what is needed to know? or was it created by something far more evil... in content against the gods? defying all they have kept from us, liek fire and knowledge? WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS ALL KNOWING SPHERE??? will it be the end of us all? or will it be our savior??
when its all over, will we ever have known from who or where it came from?
emo
08.06.05 (5:57 pm) [edit]yep. the one music i thought id never like. i do now. lol
basically, i just got into the band Hawthorne Heights. they are one of the greatest bands i have ever heard, and ive only been listening for like 4 days!!! oooo so good. lol. im about to go emo. that means, girl pants, tight band shirt, flop of hair that covers 1/4th of my face and is died pink. lol. at least, emo for halloween. girl pants r mighty comfortable.... lol. long story, involving mini putt and my friend being hot, so i offered to let her wear my shorts. which left me with the girl pants. i am not ashamed!!!
The Transition
so here we are
back to the start again
trying hard to wait till morning
hey rise and shine
and open up your eyes
to give this world some color
shine on diamond eyes
seperate the space
between love and lies
and as days go by, the memories remain
i'll wait for you
and as days go by, the memories remain
i won't let go
these days remain the same
pictures fade away
please don't ever change
please don't change your mind
no matter what they say
i'll always wait
and as days go by, the memories remain
i'll wait for you
and as days go by, the memories remain
i won't let go
these days remain the same
pictures fade away
i hope you never fade
as you drip through my veins
shine on, shine on
diamond eyes
shine on, shine on diamond eyes
shine on, shine on diamond eyes
and as days go by, the memories remain
i'll wait for you
as days go by, i swear i'll try, i'll i fill my thoughts, for me, for you
i feel
08.04.05 (5:32 am) [edit]i feel like christmas. you know that feeling when its close to christmas, and you get real excited and cant wait? i feel like that. like that, but kinda nervousy. i dont feel like telling why. well, il tell those who i want to knwo, but i dont feel like telling everyone. sry
im slowly becominh emo or punk or whatever it is. ive been listening to alot of music like that lately. luckily, techno and bands like incubus and other alternative ones r keeping me sane.
and thats it
a looong post
08.01.05 (4:45 pm) [edit]i havent posted in a while, becuz i dont know what to post. i had nothing. nothing i felt worthy of a post. but i got one now.
been a bit down lately. nothign with me is wrong. its other people. no, noone is pissing me off. no one is being an ass. no one is ignoring me. in fact, just the opposite. for some reason, people confide in me. its nothing big, but every now and then someone will say they feel bad, and then tell me why. then i usually say something or try to help them. but to do that, i take on their problem. i make it my own, see what i would do. i feel what they feel. its ok, most of the time its nothing. everyonce in a while tho its a big thing, and im affected as much as they are.
the reason ive been so down, is becuz alot of my friends have had problems. all at once. i cant sit by and not listen, i have to at least try to say something or help. so far, theres been about 6 people. and im dealing with them like 2 at a time sometimes. its hard to concentrate, its hard to take on that many problems at once. a few, i can just say, thats terrible. but others really affect me. some i dont care to go into detail, but its as if its happening to me. and its bad. no, noones going to die lol. but yea. its hard to do it all at once.
well, on a happier note- this is all thats been going on.
ive had alot of real good songs lately, ones that you can listen to over and over again.
Microsize boy- tweaker
I hope tomorrow is like today- Guster
Marrakech- ATB
those r just some. i like them alot.
i went to the movies, saw The Island. that movie is uncredible. its pure action, with an amazing storyline. i highly recommand it for suspense, thrills, chase, and explosion fans. lol
this week im going to play mini putt!!!! woo. its great cuz i get to spend time with all my friends. we just invite people to an event that we make up, we've been doing a lot this summer. movies, mini putt, etc.. we wanna do a game night next week too. set up board games and everything all over. the motto for these things: if u can get a ride, and u can pay, ur invited lol. i cant wait till we do the massive water balloon fight that spans half the town. yea. exactly as i said it. MASSIVE. thatl be really fun.
i got a new hat! to people who know me, hats are my style. if i can wear it, im wearing it. i had a red hat, and it was my fave. but i got a new one, a red and blue boston red sox (my fave team). ive been to afraid to switch over cuz i like my red hat. but this one is cool. il keep my red for certain times. it must be broken in, too.
lately its been friends with me. thats it. i have an immense fear of being alone, and i hate feeling that way. even when im home, i have the comp on to at least talk to someone. i cant stand being by myself. i guess thats y i havent said nothing about anime or anything for awhile lol. that, and my main source for it is working constantly, havent seen him all summer. but yea, ive been with friends. constantly. and music too. i love me some music lol. thats also been on constantly.
and finally, im on a diet. not to lose weight, thatd be bad. u see, im 5'8. i used to weigh 132 lbs. i thought that was ok. but i recently weighed myself, im 128 now!!! ive done nothing all summer, nothing of any work i mean. how can i lose weight!?!?! lol. andim not like real skinny. my body has some tone. i need weight!!! some l-bs lol. im tired. sry.
heres some incubus
Echo
[i]There's something about the look in your eyes
Something I noticed when the light was just right
It reminded me twice that I was alive
And it reminded me that you're so worth the fight
My biggest fear will be the rescue of me
Strange how it turns out that way
Could you show me dear...something I've not seen?
Something infinitely interesting
There's something about the way you move
I see your mouth in slow motion when you sing
More subtle than something, someone contrives
Your movements echo that I have seen the real thing
Your biggest fear will be the rescue of you
Strange how it turns out that way
Could you show me dear...something I've not seen?
Something infinitely interesting[/i]